my blundering fashion

I would like to say I have some kind of style. I love fashion, and I have always had something to do with it. I believe I am a little mainstream with the way I dress, and I cannot go past a pair of jeans, or anything with a skinny leg.

Over my life I have had a few different fashion blunders. There is no doubt I have not always rocked it. I thought at the time I was so hip and happening, but when I look back it is a little embarrassing. I guess that is the same for everyone. Maybe we all have a look at our style, and wonder what we were thinking. I have been through some awesome fashion decades with being born in the 70s. I have rocked the 80s, punk'd the 90s and I have cruised through to the 20th century.

During the Easter weekend I did the big hurl of old pieces I do not wear anymore. I had a thing for checkered pants, and that was in my early 20s. I have no idea why I have hung on to them for over 10 years. Did I really believe I would rock the checkered pants again? Maybe with a vest and a golf club in my hand I would have looked the part at a round of golf. (For the record, I can actually play golf. I played with my mum, and I was awesome at loosing the balls).

I did have a couple of nice finds that were well over 10 years old, and they still have style. For me now it is all about basics, mixed with a little floral, and some brights. And of course my rainbow of saltwater sandals!

I wonder if I will look back on my style today, and think the same?

mummy four eyes

I have eyes in the back of my head. Oh yes I do! When I became a mother I grew eyes there. They are clever eyes. They see everything that the little people think they cannot see. You can have your back to them, and know everything.

I told Keely for the first time yesterday that I had these eyes. She looked at the back of my head, and said, "but mum I cannot see them." I told her when we got home I would show her where they are.

On went the sunglasses and she snapped some photos to capture the moment. Keely finished her photography job, and then told me, "mum, I think you are tricking me, I cannot see them with your sunglasses over them!"

I love this belief she has, and I am riding with this one for a very long time. These are very special eyes mothers have. My mum had these eyes too! And now I know why she saw the things she saw.

big love

There is awesome, and then there is all kinds of awesome. This day has been all kinds of awesome.

The chaos has returned, the home is an instant mess, the carpet already needs to be vacuumed, and there has been fighting amongst the little people. BUT, there is laughter; real belly laughter, there has been fun, there has been cuddles, there has been moments you wish you could bottle up and keep forever, and there has been big love.

I love having my little people home. I love all that comes with being a mum. They rock my world. They give me belly laughs. And they love me unconditionally, like I love them.

Big love to little people!

The school mum returns tomorrow. I wonder if I can rock the second term? Lucky parents are not graded on their school parenting abilities!

the baking mum

There is something about baking. It is only a fairly new thing for me. I suck, or maybe I should say sucked at cooking. I do love it. And this afternoon I have baked some apple and cinnamon muffins for my little people.

They will be home in the next 2 hours, and I cannot wait to have a pyjama party with my little people. I have no doubt I will fall asleep with them in my arms.

The delicious, (see I am very optimistic), muffins are for morning tea tomorrow. They smell good!

Ok, I just had a bite, and they are the bomb! I can bake a mean, (moist), apple and cinnamon muffin.

one more sleep

I have cleaned, I have de-cluttered, cleaned the pram so I can sell it, taken clothes to vinnies, hidden some toys that are no longer played with, I have done my BAS, I have even done a budget, I have seen awesome friends, I have run a lot, I have had some chill time, and I have had some time to me, which I think was very much needed.

There will be a slumber party tomorrow night. It might start a habit, but right now I don't care. I want to cuddle down with my little people, and of course jump on the bed before we all go to sleep. No slumber party is complete without a jump on the bed, and of course some pillow fighting.

I love my little people; they complete me.

bachelor bunny

Having time to yourself is the bomb. You learn so much more about yourself, your life journey, and how to waste quite a bit of time doing nothing very important. You also manage to do way too much cleaning, and throw out a whole lot of stuff that clearly should of been cleared out a long time ago. I have also had one afternoon siesta, which was awesome. I have spent time with my beautiful friends, time photographing myself in randomness, and I have had lots of me time to think, and run.

In saying all of this bomb stuff; I want my little people back. I have had enough time to me. I want to play the bunny for them. I want to wake up to two sweet little people jumping all over me. Whoever thinks kids are the pits have me to answer to. They rock your world, more than you could ever know. They are the bomb. They are very much my life. And without them here I feel somewhat lost.

Some of you that have children might be wanting me to shut up, {sorry Keely, I know rude word}, as I have had this time to myself. But you know what you end up wanting them back from that moment you kiss them goodbye. Your home ends up looking like a show home, or a bachelor's pad. {I kind of want to throw some toys around, so I can trip over them}.

Three more sleeps. And I am very much counting. I miss you little people.

happy bunny day x

packing up

With the little people away the mouse is going to play.... ok so it is not going to be that interesting. It is time to pack up our lives. Put it into boxes, and start a move to something new. I am not packing my life away. It is just being relocated. I am going to build a new dance floor.

There is an element of fear in this decision. It is a big element. But there comes a time when you have to stand up for yourself. Grow those balls, and stop letting yourself be a puppet on a string, or what sometimes feels like a voodoo doll.

My mum lived in rental properties for my whole childhood, and most of my adult life before she passed away. I only knew in my early adult life that they were rental properties. She built a home in every space we lived in. She built something that I will build for my little people. Australians love to have the Aussie dream by owning their own home, but I personally believe a home is where your heart is.

I am scared. But the fear will go in time. There is a lot to do. And I will take each step knowing that I am doing this for them. I am building a new dance floor for my two children. A place where they can feel a whole lot of love, and live knowing that their mum is happy and dancing with them.

A year of opportunities. I need to take positive out of every step I take. Otherwise I will miss opportunities, and the happiness will go. I am never letting that go. Plus beyond the fun of packing there is going to be a new home to set up!

Enjoy your easter holidays! x

see you soon little people

My little people are fast asleep, and already I am missing them. Tomorrow at the crack of dawn they are leaving to go down the coast for easter. It is awesome for them. It is also a little awesome for me. However being without them will be hard. Six days without those belly laughs, and six days without beautiful cuddles.

We have had a great holiday hanging out, playing, and being rather silly. We even hit the park a few times, and this non-park mum had a really fun time. I let the crazy mum out and slid down some slides, climbed on some equipment and ran after my little people. We rocked the movies, played at the beach, played with lots of different friends, drank way too many coffees and ate some waffles.

School holidays rock!

new wheels

There is nothing like getting your first set of wheels. The little people received their first set of wheels on the weekend. Keely's first big girl bike, and Taj's first two wheel bike.

I helped Keely ride her bike, and it was an awesome moment.

We all need balance in life, and I have been knocked off my balance a little; stress, not sadness. I am finding my new balance as I ride on a new path in our life. I am back on my bike, and there are friends, and people I do not even know, holding me up. I will ride with my little people by my side, and keep their balance intact.

I am happy. There is no stopping my dancing heart!

get up and ride

Sometimes in life we fall off our bikes. We are scared to hop back on again, and make those wheels go. I fell off. I tried to get back on, and I couldn't do it. I took all the steps possible to ride again, but failed. I tried though. But I failed. {Failed might not be the right word. Actually it is the wrong word. But until I accept that I will be fine, I will stick with fail}.

Today I hopped back on my bike. It is a different bike. One I am not too sure about. I don't know where this bike will take me in life, but I have courage. And I think that courage, along with a whole lot of love from my little people will show me that it doesn't matter what bike you hop on; you can ride any bike when you have hope.

I need to build a new sandcastle. I am blessed to have my beautiful friends help me build again.

A new bike. A new road, and a new sandcastle. It is all brand new.

fresh start.

mall rat tribute

Go on press play, and read. Listen to Eye of The Tiger, Rocky Tribute edition, and you will feel my true love for the mall......The mall and I are not friends. We do not go together. Two very different personalities. I am patient, but I am not patient enough to deal with road rage in the carpark, lining up to pay for things, dealing with shop assistants that clearly don't want to be there, and I am far from attempting the mall with little people in tow.

I look up to those who can rock the mall on a thursday night; mall rats. They hang out in groups. All dressed up and no where else to go. I was never one. Couldn't do it. I was the movies or backyard parties girl, or I would just stay home with my family.

Over the weekend I braved the mall, and became a mall rat. For a very short period of time. I wanted one simple thing, and I had to go to the mall to get it. It was raining, and I had no little people. I sucked it up, and drove up the ramp to the carpark. First thing I said was the F word. It was busy. Really busy. I was going to drive down the first ramp to exit, when a lady unlocked her car. I was in. I had a park as soon as I had entered the carpark. Honestly there were that many cars in front of me, I was lucky. Lucky enough to buy a lottery ticket, which for some reason I didn't. Now that is silly, as I could of been writing a more interesting blog post today.

I sucked in that much air, put my headphones on, pressed play to my rockin' music, went to the shop I needed to go to, and I got the hell out of there.

You can tell a mall lover, (that is sarcastic), as they have their headphones on, and no blinkers.

Do you rock it? Or are you like me, and go twice a year, if you have to.

{I bought new skins, compression tights, to run in. My version of the mall rat moment. If I did not need them at that moment, I would of bought them online. Online shopping is the bomb. There are no rats online}.

the dancing bunny

You can have your sandcastle jumped on, you can be punched in the face, and you can be standing at a crossroad and unsure of your next step, or which way to turn. It is scary. But it is also hopeful. There is that much love in this little pinwheel home. A whole lot of heart goes into the simple things. The heart is there on the sleeve, and it is too beautiful to be ripped apart. Sandcastles can be rebuilt, the pain of the punch goes away, and the next step can be done with help.

Sometimes all we need is love. And to have that in yourself, and surrounding you is enough.

Have a beautiful weekend. The bunny is coming to the Little Pinwheel home tomorrow. This bunny has new dancing shoes (runners), and will be hopping very high, and fast.

And our bunny rocks!

the crossroad

There comes a time in your life where you have to believe in yourself more than you have ever believed in yourself before. Where you have to take all the awesome, all the positive and put that all first. Look at that. And I mean really look at that for as long as it takes for you to see through it, which will enable you to take on that crossroad. Head on.

We all face crossroads. You can go one way or the other. It is an everyday thing. There are times when that crossroad is dark, cold, and very scary. That is the moment where you need to turn to the left, and turn to the right. Grab those hands from your friends, from your family, take a deep breath, close those eyes, suck up the pain of your anxiety and take the step. The step.

I am there. I stand there. I have turned to the left and I have turned to the right. I hold the hands of my friends with one tight grip. The grip of fear. There is a lot of fear. To admit that you are scared, is the first step.

I am facing the anxiety right now. It hurts. It hurts that much it is painful to breathe. To get through the day I run. I run to get rid of it. To clear all that pain. To dance. To dance and remember that I dance for my heart. I dance to that beat. I am twirling that fast, I believe I cannot stop. There is no stopping me. I need to take that. That happiness, and that person, and take the deepest breath to take that step.

Time to move. Breathe through the pain. And have a whole lot of hope. Hope gives me strength.

There are times when it is ok to look back. To turn your head and see where you have walked. It helps to see the past, and see how far you have come. That is strength in itself.

I am not sure which way I will go. All I know is I will go with a whole lot of heart, and with my little people standing at the end waiting for their mum.

building sandcastles

Have you ever had one of those days? A day where it felt like you were punched in the face by someone. And it be intentional?......That was my day. I had that.

I turned a hurt mum into an awesome mum for my little people this afternoon. I made it easy on me, and beautiful for them. They had no idea I was sad mum, and that is very important to me.

They ate fish and chips for dinner. I had a double shot 3/4 latte.

We put our feet in the sand, when we should of been at home doing the bedtime routine, (such a rebel moment, go mum)!

We built a sandcastle. Keely and Taj ran and jumped. We built it again. They ran and jumped again.

We built it one last time. And I ran and jumped.

People can push your buttons. They can punch you in the face. They can even kick you when you are down. But you can rise above it. Find strength you did not know you had. And when there is a long road of punches in the face, you can put your hand up and ask for help. That is courage.

It is all about my little people. And building new sandcastles.

our simple bunny ears

This week is all about the bunny. We are in preparation for easter with our little pinwheel easter happening this saturday. The bunny is coming early, and coming twice! With it being all about the bunny we decided to create some bunny ears. Simple bunny ears. Something that Keely and Taj could make themselves with little help from me.

We bought coloured cardboard, and cut out the shape of the ears. After they stuck down their inner bits of the bunny ears I measured their heads to get the perfect fit with a strip of cardboard. Stuck it all together and they rocked their bunny ears for the afternoon.

Taj of course had black for the boy bunny, and Keely pink for the girl bunny.

Apparently today we are making me a set of bunny ears. Keely has decided we need to jazz up our ears with things from our craft box. Nothing like a little bunny bling. This could get very interesting! I already have fluro pink toenails due to Keely's request.

mini and maximus rocks little pinwheel

I love cool threads. Especially cool threads that you wish were blown up into adult sizes so you could rock them too. Mini & Maximus is that brand I would wear if only I could squeeze into little people sizes.

Mini & Maximus not only design their own prints, they also collaborate with little artists around the world to bring you their awesome range each season. You can buy them online at Little Pinwheel.

Love it!

little knickers

Taj rolled with it. He wanted to roll with it. His first day venturing out of the home with knickers on.

"No nappy mum!"

Those were his very words to me this morning while taking off his nighttime nappy. I asked if he wanted knickers on, and he said, "Yes mum!" There was that much excitement in his little voice, I rolled with it. We rolled with it, and so did Taj's pre school teachers.

One accident, and a day of having a cute little bottom in his cool threads.

Rock on Taj!

hello holiday mum

No more packing school lunches, no more barefoot pick ups, and bare bottom pick ups, (Taj's bottom, not mine), and no more morning chaos. Roll out of bed, throw some cool Little Pinwheel threads on and hang with mum.

Today we are onto our first day of school holiday fun. Keely is off to vacation care today, and on Friday. Otherwise we are going to be having a whole lot of fun together. I cannot wait to be with her. To have a child that is not exhausted and up and down with her moods. I am looking forward to going to the movies with her. I don't even know the last time I went personally. So this will be a beautiful moment to share this week.

Taj will love having his buddy to hang out with. He misses his sister when she is at school.

This week I will be planning our easter for this weekend. I am not having my little people over easter, and I need to have our thing. I need to play the bunny, and have the easter egg hunt. I need to have a week of crazy crafts with easter hats, baskets, and a week of being a non school mum.

I love my little people. I love playing holiday mum. She rocks more than school mum!

a birthday with style

I ran. I remembered. I reflected.

A day that was full of emotions, and a day that was completely awesome. I spent it with friends. I spent it alone. I spent it with my little people. And I spent it with my mum.

Two birthdays were celebrated in style.

Thank you to my beautiful little people, my awesome friends, {you all rock my world}, to customers, to blog readers, and to strangers for making our day a memorable one.

happy birthday mumso & number two little pinwheel

To know she is proud. To know that she walks by my side is all I need. I miss my mum. I am doing awesome in so many ways in my life, and I cannot tell you how much that hurts to not have her here to see me succeed in my life.

To walk forward; and not look back, to hold my head up high; and not too high, to dance to the beat of my own heart; and to one day dance with someone else, to rock it; and to rock it with my little people, to laugh with my friends; and to laugh with new friends, to smile at a stranger; and have a stranger smile right back at me, to walk on my own; and to walk with someone new, to make fun of myself; and to laugh at my own jokes, to have someone laugh at me; and for me to laugh with them, to be me; and to be me with my mum in my heart.

I am grateful.

Happy number two Little Pinwheel, and happy 63rd birthday to my Mumso.

There has not been one day where I have not thought of you. It still hurts as much as it did the day I saw you take your last breath. Forever in my heart. Forever you are me.

love x

the sore post

I have nothing to say. Actually that is a lie, as I am here, and I am typing away and seeing what I come out with. Right now I am hurting.

I was running, and had my line. Runners have a line they run. It might not be a straight road, but there is always a line. Two walkers taking up the whole footpath did not move, and in turn I had been nudged off onto the grass, and ironically there was a hole that I slipped into, and POW. I slid on the ground. The walkers did not stop. I am sore, but I will run tomorrow.

My little people rock. I love them that much.

Tomorrow I will eat cake with my little people, and some awesome friends; a little pinwheel and mumso cake.