Tuesday, May 26, 2015

be brave and climb ladders

If a black cat crosses your path, or if you walk under a ladder, do you feel like you are going to be dished out some bad luck?

For a few years I have been dreaming of making a difference. Moving toward some huge changes, standing up so tall and strong with my hopes and my dreams to change the world. {Yes, I wish I was a superhero to make this all easier}. I thought I would never see any of this happen in my lifetime, that someone else, (possibly my children), would continue the path I am on. Little did I realise that my voice would travel far enough to the right people and the wheels would turn faster.

I was going to keep all of this to myself. I didn't want to jinx it all. But this afternoon I realised that it is best to speak up and be proud of what I have achieved. Share the awesome!

A couple of weeks ago I had a meeting with the Premier's Senior Advisor. Mike Baird has supported me a lot with the Be Brave campaign, and sharing my story in Parliament. He hasn't stopped supporting me. From the moment I left that office, a letter was composed by Mike Baird to the Minister of Education on my behalf. It takes a good 6-8 weeks to hear back. From there I will sit with one of his Advisors to put across my ideas with educating children and teachers about child sexual assault awareness. 

That is it in a nutshell. There is more to it, and it isn't as easy as it sounds. I however do believe that what I have already achieved is huge, and I am really proud that I have turned an awful start in life, to being one that could change lives. 

I always wanted to "get him," as my mum put it the day he walked free out of the Supreme Court. It isn't about getting him, or making him pay for what he did. The life I have chosen, and the steps I take are the best thing I can do for me. I have started flicking those dominos, and they will all fall.

He will fall.

The mirror could break, the black cat may walk in front of me, and I will still keep moving forward; because I don't walk alone.  

Friday, May 22, 2015

the kissing goals

Some nights when I kiss my littles goodnight for the second time, (you know the sneaky tuck in before you turn in for the night), I wonder how I am doing this. How am I able to be a motherless daughter, and parent without a backup parent.

My children deserve to know their Nan-nan. My mum deserves to know her grandchildren. If only I had a day where she could be here, and we could share our lives once more. I would love for her to see their joy, their love and for mum to see that I'm doing the best I can do; her grandchildren are beautiful, loving, kind and caring. 

Who am I kidding, I would love more than one day. I would love a lifetime. There's so much to show mum. There are people she's never met that have shown me love and life. I know the simple act of mum having a coffee where I have coffee everyday would bring a whole lot of joy into my little community. She had that way about her.

When I wake up tomorrow morning, I will realise I am doing it. I am being a mum to my children. I am living life, and sharing me with the people around me. My mum may not be here with me, although I like to hope she has left such a big part of herself with me. Sometimes I feel alone and other times, I feel her right here with me. 

I love kissing my children goodnight. It is the moment you realise we rocked our day. Tomorrow we wake up and rock another. It doesn't matter if there are smiles, or tears, if there are tantrums or laughter. However we get through it, we always have the kiss goodnight.


Related Posts with Thumbnails