In about 6 weeks I am giving my sister away. I am going to hold her hand and walk with her just like my mum would have. I am putting my feet in my mum's shoes for a day. (I of course will be wearing saltwater sandals, my gold ones)!
Both my sister and I will be walking with our mum. A moment that will be hard, and one that will be happy.
A proud moment.
I am scared to go back to Canberra. I am scared to go back to a town I have not returned to. Mum lived in Sydney close to me for the last few months of her life, and lived in Canberra with us for our whole childhood. The last time I was in Canberra was the day I carried my mum in front of all the people she had touched in her life. We will be getting ready for the wedding in the home my mum used to own. One of my sister's friends bought it from her when she moved to Sydney. It is apparently very different now. Not the same as it is in my heart. Sometimes you think you have faced all of your fears in life, and then you realise there are still some there to face.
Life is full of hurdles and moments where you have to pull that strength out.