What do you do when it becomes too hard. Do you rock in the corner. Cry. Scream. Find the nearest wall, and start bashing your head. Or do you withdraw and hope that this hard part of parenting will pass?
Why do mothers rock in that corner on their own? Wouldn't it be nicer to have a friend or someone that cares pick you up, and help you stand on those two feet.
Easy to say. But when you are that person in the corner rocking, or wanting to walk out that door, you don't speak up.
Is this judgement of parenting; just because you stand up and say this is hard, you are less the mum that you know you are?
I am not coping. I am exhausted. I have had to have more blood tests. More iron injected into my body. I can't yell anymore. I just cry. I sob. I have an almost 6 year old rubbing my back telling me that it will be ok. And the thing is, it will be ok again.
This is parenting. I believe we should be able to say how proud we are of our children, how we rocked the mother of the year for the day, and then on the other hand be able to say that the day was hard. That right now you are not coping. You are the woman in the corner. You are the woman that can no longer yell, because it takes less energy to cry.
Parenting is hard, rewarding and something I love. There is no way I could walk out that door on my little people, and there is no way I will sit here and cry in the corner on my own, even if it is my almost 6 year old sitting in the corner crying with me.
But the naked truth is, I wanted to walk out the door. I wanted to bash my head against the wall. Instead I cried with my daughter, and wrote this blog post.