Thursday, April 12, 2012

buying a straight smile

I have teeth. I kind of hide them when I smile. I have two crowns at the front, and a half a metal molar. It is my fault they are like they are.

I punished myself with food for many years from the child abuse. It was my coping mechanism, along with other things. This was something I could control. Now I am out of control with how much money they are costing me. You may think it is cosmetic, but I want nothing more than a big shiny smile with straight teeth. My bottom teeth are crowded, about 3 need to be removed. I am up to my second round of root canal on one of my front crowns, (yes one of my crowns, which cost me $1500 on its own 12 years ago, has now cost me another $700, and two more sessions to come on that tooth alone). After this will be straight teeth, and with a bit of luck I won't have to have both crowns replaced within the next 12 months.

If I could be an advocate to stress how bad eating disorders are on our bodies, I would scream it from the highest point. It is my own fault I now have to tend to my teeth from acid build up from continuous vomiting for over 10 years killing them. Half of my tooth fell out eating bread one day, and that was from decay build up rotting my tooth. My two front teeth started to overlap from decay in between them. I had them filed back, and two crowns put over the top 12 years ago. One tooth had root canal done at the time, and now the other is having it done. This stress on my crown from drilling increases the possibility it will need to be replaced. Being my front teeth, I will need to have them both replaced to colour match. This may not happen, and I could have the same crowns for the next 20 years.

Look after your smile.

I will be honest and say this will be a great present to give to myself, (if these two front teeth stay in my mouth for a few more years). It is the final journey of the healing process from my abuse. It is my end. It is the pat on the back for dealing with such a horrible disease. It is also accepting that it is something I will deal with for the rest of my life; with a big, straight, pearly white smile.


  1. we have had a peak at that smile now and then, especially the smile that is in your heart- and it is glorious.

    I know that soon the outside will match the inside, and though an exhausting process, it will bring you what you need and deserve

    Bee :)

  2. You deserve that straight smile Hayley...I cant believe how much you look like Keely in this particular photo, beautiful x

  3. just remember the eating disorder was not your fault but a reaction/a consequence to the abuse... a coping mechanism, if you like, which although totally sucks, got you through that very rough time!!! it is not YOUR fault that you teeth took the brunt, it was also not your fault that you had the ED, and not your fault that you were abused!!

    YAY for looking after yourself and for a new fresh smile :)



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