Friday, January 23, 2015

no rule books

My little people are growing up pretty fast. Probably at the same rate as your little people are. {That is of course if you have children}. Sometimes you blink and you see a glimpse of a teenager within your 9 year old daughter. That is when I am pretty quick to shut my eyes, and bring back my 9 year old girl. It is exciting watching them grow, and learning about themselves more, and us learning about them too.

Lately my daughter and son have been splitting some of their time between myself and their dad, out of their normal routine. I am not sure what you do in these circumstances, there are no rule books, and my gut tells me to go with the flow, and not make a big deal out of it. 

Yesterday Taj wanted to stay with his dad's partner and later see his dad. It was to her face he asked, and straight to mine. Inside I was screaming, 'no, why am I not cool enough to hang out with.' On the outside, and the rationale me, was thinking, that is pretty nice that my son feels comfortable enough around her to spend time alone and be with her on their own,(and with his half baby sister too). I think that is awesome he cares about her, and she cares for him.

I knew the time would come when they would start choosing whom they wanted to be with more. I was just expecting it when they were in their teens. 

All of this aside, the bonus was I got to have a quality one on one day with Keely. It was pretty special and something I wanted to do again before the holidays were over. She has also been wanting me a bit more, so this was a great for both of us that her brother decided to hangout at their dad's house.

Divorced families can be tough, although sometimes I think they are tougher if you resist the flow. I know there are boundaries, and we need to watch that it doesn't become a regular thing if Taj or Keely believe they can get 'more' out of either parent. It is a balancing act we will all work out together.

We are off to the mountains tomorrow! A photo shoot, and some down time for this little pinwheel family before the school chaos begins again. Oh how I would love another week of holidays.

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