Tuesday, April 7, 2015

my mum held my hand, as I held my daughter's hand

Today is a huge day for me, it is Little Pinwheel's 6th birthday and my mum's birthday too. Each year it is a double celebration for the business that continues to be a success and the mum I have sadly lost. Every birthday I realise how lucky I am and grateful I am to have made the decisions I have made in life. All of this wouldn't be possible without my mum's love and support. She doesn't know about Little Pinwheel, as it was launched 2 years after she passed away. However I know she would be proud.

Today was also huge because my beautiful girl asked if I had a dad, and she asked me where he was. I knew by the look on her face and the way that she asked me, that she knew that he had not been a nice man. I guess her question came up today after we had looked through my mum's album, and there is not one image of me growing up with a father in it. 

Keely's eyes welled up as the questions started. I hope I said the right things, and I think I did. I told her that I don't have a dad because he hurt me. I told Keely he was mean to me. She cried, and she asked me what he did. I told her that I am ok, that her mum is here and safe and right there with her. He could not hurt me anymore. 

To hold her hand in mine and see the pain she had on her face was heartbreaking. She genuinely cared.  I told her that is why I run, why I helped her school, and why I continue to do things to help make children safe.

I am grateful that Keely asked me these questions. I am also glad it was today; I had mum holding my hand.

Happy birthday mumso, and happy birthday Little Pinwheel! {Woo hoo, 6 years}

*I shared mine and Keely's conversation as I feel this is a turning point in my life. Back when mum passed away, Keely was 7 months old. She saved me through the loss of my mum. Today she may just have done the saving again. I needed my groove back in the dreams I have inside my heart. I just need to find my shuffle again, and I will be dancing towards helping create a safe environment for our children.

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